Tuesday, November 20, 2012

The Day After and the Day Before

We somehow made it through our first day back at work without Tyler yesterday.

There was no shortage of tears, stories, moments of disbelief and questions as too how we all move forward without the smiling face, laughter, and whirlwind of the kid who made the place we all work at fun to be a part of.

Losing one person always leaves ripples on the others around. It is a soft, powerful, empty place that we all share now. The immensity of loss that someone was taken so quickly, and tragically. The knowing that there are friends around us suffering ad struggling to make sense of a death that is beyond any of our collective abilities to reason.

For myself and Joe it is a desperate attempt to be strong for those we love who are feeling unable to return to work and to stay in the place that Tyler's presence embodies. For others they can get caught up in the routine-ness of the day to day activities of trying to take care of the pets left in our care.

We are jostled back into the freshness of the reality of our loss by the intermittent arrival of more flowers. A fragrant reminder of the community wanting to try to help ease our pain, and be a part of our healing. It is nothing that anything other than time can heal.

We are closing the clinic early tomorrow. It is supposed to be the the beginning of the holiday weekend, but for everyone I know and care about it is the final day for us to see Tyler and the day we all come together to say our final goodbyes.

This clinic is the place of so many lives intertwined with so many others. We have celebrated weddings, babies, and now the loss of our youngest family member. It is the place where people cry, see miracles happen, and remind us everyday how short, fleeting, and precious life is.

I sat quietly with my three kitties, my three doggies, and my immense mountain of grief this morning and watched the sun rise and the sky turn from red to pink to orange and thought about how grateful I am to have lived this life I was given. Each blessed day, each pet I got to meet, greet, love, help live, help die, and all of the lives I have been lucky enough to share in some small way. For Tyler I can only say that I know my life is stronger, richer, deeper, and inspired from knowing you. I will carry your smile with me and within the hearts of every soul that JVC touches in an effort to be true to your spirit.

How else do I try to move on from a loss that seems impossible to understand?

Tomorrow is Tyler's funeral, and another day for us all to be grateful and do great things even if it is simply in the eyes of the tiniest kittens purr, or the largest dogs tail wag.

It is truly a great man who can leave behind a legacy that ominous from those few years.

Joe and I went to work yesterday to try to help our staff get through what was a very very difficult day.

Our plan was very simple; to tell each person at JVC that we love them, we are there for them, and that we will get through this, and everything else we are ever faced with together.

Tyler's news coverage;




1 comment:

  1. I share in your tears, a life to young is always a great loss. I know from my own life that I see a close friend one day and not the next, I try to live on and carry the wish of my dear friend. One that Joe might remember is Fireman Dye. On the UTE. If I can prevent one person from loss of life I strive to interact in a positive way. Again I'm very sorry for the loss of your friend and the family. Corey A. Wade " ute76@charter.net