Will Your Pet Have A Happily Ever After?

There are many of us who are passionate about animals. I spent most of last evening with someone who was so passionate that she has been elevated from "oligarch owner" status to self proclaimed "adroit animal aggressor." She, and I, have a great deal in common.

When it comes to being committed to helping animals we are on the same team. We chant similar fight songs, viewpoints on the anthropomorphism, and would prefer to not go on vacation than leave our kids at home alone. But, we differ on a few points.

She was telling me a story about a dog she had been called to re-home many years ago. It seems the dog she was asked to help had been adopted by an elderly woman in her 70's after her husband had died. A few years later it was decided that the woman required full time care and needed to be taken  to a retirement home, and so her companion needed to go elsewhere. She described in some detail how she believed the elderly woman was just being "selfish to adopt a pet when she was so old."

That conversation caused me to pause when I recollected the events of earlier in the week when I was talking to Dr.Morgan at the clinic.

Dr. Morgan and I were standing in the reception area. At her feet was a small Yorkie who I recognized immediately.

"What is Ben doing with you?" I asked.

I knew that Ben had been in the hospital all last week when Dr. Morgan removed multiple bladder stones and that he had appeared to be recovering well.

"I did Ben's surgery pro bono last week because his family couldn't afford it and his parents are going into a retirement home. The kids can't take him." And hence, since his recovery last week, Ben had been staying with Dr. Morgan. He was now her small silver shadow and where she went he was sure to follow.

I was dumbfounded. I had seen Ben and his mom for years and I couldn't imagine one without the other.

Dr. Morgan and I just stood there. Trying to put ourselves in the families shoes. 

She said to me, "I'm not getting a pet when I grow older."

I looked at her and said, "That's bull. You will always have pets. Just like me. We couldn't exist without them."

"Yeah, you're right," she agreed.

And there we were contemplating how we keep our hearts whole, and not leave a pet to be disposed of when we can no longer care for them. And so we left it. A decision to be who we were, and a decision to hope that our family would understand that those we might leave behind still had value.

We watched as Ben's mom came in to say goodbye to her Ben. We all cried. I cried because Ben had spent all week following Tracy around like a lost sheep, until he saw his mom. He jumped, and squealed, and threw himself into her arms. We all cried. We all stood there facing their pivotal point in life that we all hope we never have to face.

Do I know what my decision will be when my time comes to be cared for and I can no longer care for my pets? Well, no. But I know that I will not let them pay for my mortality. That every speck of whatever is left of my life's accumulations and work can be left behind to care for my pets. Does my family understand my position on my pets? Yes, they do. We, my family, understands that my anthropomorphism transcends my physical life. That until the day comes where I am not of sound mind or body I will loose every single solitary physical possession to maintain the ability to care for my family, who in my case are my pets.

I have had long distressing conversations with clients who requested that I put their pets to sleep should they die. They have been the most difficult moments of my professional life. How do I tell a parent who is so worried and fearful that their pets will be abused, neglected, or hurt after they depart that they would choose to put them to sleep, that I cannot honor their fears? I can only be honest. I try to retell stories like Ben's, and remind people that there are other people out there who love pets as we do, and that your final act of love for your  pets is to give them another chance at a happy life. Where there are happy, healthy days left to live there is desire in every pet to run, play, wag, purr, smile, love and breathe. How can, and why would, you deny them this?

As for Ben; he is an extension of our Jarrettsville Vet family. He has been with Dr. Morgan for two weeks, and will go to his new home on Sunday. Because where we can find a way to make a happy ending we will always do so.

We wish Ben and his mom a happy ever after, and we will keep them both in each others heart and minds with frequent picture postings.

As far as the pets you leave behind, please come up with a plan for them. They need you to be the one who sees them as a child to be cared for after you can no longer do so.

This week also brings the return of Frankie, who's parents died suddenly and unexpectedly. She is once again looking for another home to call her own. For information on her please email me, or find me at the clinic, Jarrettsville Vet.

And as always, remember to hug your kids. Life is a very short and precious thing.

Many Thanks to Dr. Morgan for being Ben's lifesaver, for Kathleen for giving Ben a home, and for Claudia in never giving up on Frankie.

For more information on a living will for the pets you leave behind please visit; What Happens After You Leave Your Pets Behind.

If you have a pet question or want to share your pets story with other pet lovers please visit Pawbly.com. Pawbly is free for everyone to use. If you see your pets as your kids you will be at home with us.

You can also find me on Twitter @FreePetAdvice.

What Happens After You Leave Your Pets Behind?

URGENT Appeal to Animal Lovers or Folks Who Know Animal Lovers,

Important and Urgent Need to Find Good Home(s) for Two Loving Cats ( may be separated ),

Frankie.

Little One

 “Little One “ a sweet, quiet purring lover  “ Frankie” – timid, quiet, equally loving 

         

On January 2, 2014,  my brother, Mark, fell asleep in the Lord in his home in Maryland. Though his Golden Retriever, Andy, now has a loving home here with our Golden, Brady, one of my sons as well as I have respiratory allergy to cats. We are so sad we unable to provide that same love and protection for “Little One” – a white, pointed 5 yr. old cat and “Frankie” – a mixed older Siamese cat.  Each cat’s disposition is very good  - both raised as inside cats – “Frankie” is very timid though loving, and needs tons of petting, while “Little One “ purrs closely in your ear as she gives you all the love and attention you’d ever desire. Both cats are up to date with all medicals, since they have been boarded and cared for by the most compassionate veterinary clinic on the planet, Jarrettsville Veterinary Center.     www.jarrettsvillevet.com

http://kmdvm.blogspot.com/2014/01/the   

Dr. Magnifico and all her extraordinary staff are assisting us during this difficult time in the expectation that collectively we can network this message expediently to find each cat a loving, secure, permanent new home.  Mark’s hope was that each catcontinue to receive the love his home provided, as both cats were brought into their household by Mark’s wife Rita, who also passed in the Lord just six months earlier this past summer. Our family will additionally arrange and provide for the transportation associated with transitioning either cat to a new home, as they may live separately. Should you be, or know of a household seeking more information on adopting these cats,please reach out to us via my Facebook page.

             KINDLY help us by swiftly networking this appeal to your contacts.  

Sylvester

The above pleas was written by Claudia, the sister of one of our long time clients the Rabiecki's.

When your practice has been in the community for over 50 years you are a part of the landscape. We are tied to our community and feel proud to serve as both a caretaker for their family whether it be to share the crazy antics of the new puppy or to be a shoulder to lean on through the dark days of losing your pet. But there are a few roles we play behind the scenes that the community rarely hears about.

When we lose a human member of our family we are there to help with the transition of their pets. For the Rubiecki's it was a terrible sequence of events that left a family of three cats and a two year old Golden Retriever orphaned and homeless. 

Like so many of us our family is a close knit interdependent group of individuals all sharing a common home with adults who provide food, shelter, veterinary care, and love. The days weave themselves into years and few of us stop to think that our pets might outlive us. This winter we have had three separate families die in their homes without anyone knowing. Days went by and the pets had to fend for themselves. When the deceased were found Animal Control was called in to take the pets to the shelter where they were fed and cared for. But shelters are scary places for pets to go. There is the constant inescapable threat of illness and the real possibility of not being adopted, or losing your spot in the cage due to overcrowding or a "more adoptable" pet.

When I received a call from our clients family that the pets had been taken to the shelter we immediately called and asked that all of their pets be either transferred to the clinic, or held until the families next of kin could arrive to claim them. I was assured that the pets would be kept safely allowing the family to arrive from New England. A few days later the sister of our client, Claudia, called. She was trying to find homes for the three cats due to her severe allergies. I explained to her that we would be happy to help her with this. We went to pick up the brood and brought them all to stay with us while she made her brothers funeral arrangements.

Of the three cats, Sylvester was the most fragile. He had been dealing with a serious illness while his dad was alive, but the stress of being left alone for days, being kept in the shelter, and then moved to the clinic, proved to be too much for his aged self. He died in our care about a week after he arrived. He was not alone, and although he received every medical treatment option available he just didn't have the strength or reserves to pull through. 

Little One, the youngest, and the most outgoing was placed easily after a few Facebook postings and an incredible word of mouth effort from his aunt and newly adopted JVC family. He lives a few miles away and his new mom sends us photos every few weeks. 

Frankie, at 16, and already a shy introverted soul took about three months to place. She was adopted by a client who only adopts the "older and harder to place" cats. I met her on Friday. She is a kind, patient, soft spoken woman who understands Frankie's needs and requirements. I am sure that there is no better home for Frankie.

As for that two year old Golden puppy Andy, well, his story was a bit shorter, but no less dramatic. We knew Andy from the time that he was an 8 week old puppy. His parents loved him immensely and he was always with them. Claudia wanted to bring him to her home and keep him. He would join her family of two boys and her Golden. He stayed with us at the clinic for the few days that it took for her to bury her brother, settle his estate, and close up their home. I was speaking to Claudia every few days, giving her updates on the cats and Andy, and helping her in whatever small way that we could. 

On the day that Andy was to be picked up and head back to Massachusetts with Claudia I was summoned to the front desk. There was a small woman demanding Andy. Seems she was the breeder who had co-owned Andy with his dad, our client, and now she was demanding I surrender him to her. Without much of a chance of introducing myself, she became irritable and boisterous. I asked her to step into one of the exam rooms with me to try to diffuse her anger. Seems she was angry with Andy's aunt and came to me to try to assert and demand that I surrender what she believed to be "her property." If any of you know me you know that I am not afraid of a loud demanding person. There is no amount if screaming, harassing, swearing, belittling, or grief that you can throw at me that will get me to bend. In fact it is quite the opposite. I let her dump her accusations, beliefs and opinions. When she finished she handed me a folder. Well, I should clarify, she tried to hand me a folder. 

"I'm sorry," I said, but you are not my client. You can demand anything that you want, but unless you are the client listed on Andy's medical record, or the state/county Animal Control, I will not allow you to see or take Andy." 

"I will sue you!" she screamed!

"Well, we live in the United States Of America, you can sue anyone you want to. It's still not going to change what I am telling you right now. Andy is in my care as placed here by my clients next of kin and I am only surrendering him to her or the state as requested by the formal documentation that they are required to give me should he be deemed a danger to the public."

After her scare/screaming tactics failed she tried to coerce me to review the legal paperwork she had that clearly stated Andy was hers. Once again I refused to touch or look at it. That paperwork was hers and if she had a case for Andy she could take Andy's aunt to court.

"Well, I believe that Andy's aunt is unfit for his care and I just wanted to take Andy so that I could see how he behaves around her. If he's OK with her I will give him to her," she quietly tried.

"I am an exceptional judge of character. I have no doubt that that is a total bold faced lie. You have no intention of doing anything for Andy's aunt who is the only person that has stepped forward to help all of the Rubiecki's pets." I said.

"You're right," she chirped. She gave up and I escorted her out the front door.

Claudia arrived ten minuted later and we smuggled Andy out the back. 

Two days later the breeder and Claudia reached a settlement for the half of Andy that the breeder felt was hers.

Andy, happy to be heading home to live with aunt Claudia.

Life isn't always fair, and it certainly isn't always predictable, but if you have pets please take a few moments to think about where they would go should you become incapable of caring for them, and be good to your sister, friends, siblings, etc..they just might be your pets saving grace!

All of us at JVC wish the Rabiecki clan a very long happy life in their new homes!


Estate Planning for Pets Information

If you have any pet related questions, comments, or just want to share your pet stories with me, you can find me on Pawbly.com. Or you can follow me on Twitter @FreePetAdvice, or I'm always available at the vet clinic, Jarrettsville Vet.

With love from my pups, Jekyll and Charlie